I’m really not sure how to write this. I’m feeling pretty depressed about it all, but I can’t change it, and I guess, I’ve had it better than some.
As most of my readers will know, I’ve had a few submissives lately. Well, it’s changed. Nenya, I’ve seen coming for a while. She’s not really a submissive type, and she doesn’t want to do it any more. It’s her choice of course, and I respect it. It doesn’t hurt any less for it though. I met Nenya in Sociolotron. She’s been my pet in Second Life for a year. As of now, she is free, and I wish her the best of everything. I hope we’re friends for many more years. D/s isn’t everything.
The other was more of a surprise. Eloise emailed me today to tell me she didn’t want to be my sub anymore. She’s been ill for a month or so and hasn’t been around. Something changed during that time, obviously. Her too, I wish well, and hope our friendship remains. This hurts too.
Kaili left a long time ago. She wanted to explore. She’s still a friend though and we talk in Eve. Perhaps a template for the future.
So now I have no subs. Damian told me I could easily get more in SL. The point is… I’m not sure I want to. I spent a year being a Domme, and maybe it’s enough. Maybe I should go back to being plain, ordinary Sio. I still have my beloved Freya, partners now for two years, and lovers longer. She’s stayed with me though rough times and smooth, good and bad… We’ve had fights, and we’ve had fun times. She is my world.
So where do I go from here? Right now, I just want to cry, my heart aches so bad. But I have good friends, and I know they look out for me, so I guess I have it better than many who might be in my position.